By-Matt Marino-Contributing Writer/Football Reporters Online/Pro Football NYC
As a kid growing up in Brooklyn, New York, I’d go up to the roof every July 4th for the fireworks, look to the left and the Towers were the first thing in sight. I’d be on my way home from school, driving towards Manhattan and they were the first buildings to come into view. Exiting Giants stadium from the upper tier, they were the first buildings you saw as you looked back towards the East. And when you came up out of the subway anywhere in the city and lost your sense of direction for a couple of seconds, you could always look up, find the Twin Towers and know exactly where you were. Growing up here, they became a compass.
The City’s sports teams did their part in the aftermath of 9/11. Then NFL commissioner Paul Tagliabue and MLB commissioner Bud Selig did the right thing and cancelled a weeks worth of games. But, it was also the right thing to do by resuming play a week later. The right thing because it was something people around New York City needed.
Following the 9/11 attacks, the city and the people of the city were shocked, hurt and exhausted. I remember listening to then New York Giants and New York Jets coaches, Jim Fassel and Herm Edwards, explaining that the scope of what happened did not set in until they drove by the commuter rail stations in New Jersey and Long Island respectively (where each team would practice) and see the same cars in the same parking spots and that’s when it hit them that those people were not coming back. It was also when they realized that their coaches and players needed do anything possible to help heal a city.
In the days after the attacks, athletes from the New York area teams began visiting the first responders at Ground Zero. Whether they handed out bottled water or just visited family members, who had lost loved ones, it was important they were there. They did not do it out of obligation to the team they played for, but because they were part of the community of New York City, representatives of the people of the city. Professional athletes that were playing for New York felt a new connection to the city, and its fans.
How we experience sporting events in this country changed that day. When you go to a stadium now, there is a good chance you will need to walk through a metal detector, there are mandatory bag checks, armed military personnel, and the Department of Homeland Security has trained teams on how to protect their stadiums against acts of terrorism. You will also see more American flags in stadiums displayed by fans than prior to the events of 9/11. There is now a seriousness to the national anthem and there certainly will be this Sunday. Video boards scan the fans, crowds cheer and chant USA as the camera locks on to a firefighter, police officer or a member of the Armed Forces - all things that were not a usual occurrence before 9/11.
Some people disagreed with the decision to resume professional sports after 9/11 but I recall the role the games that the New York sports teams played during that fall. Mike Piazza won the first game played in New York City after the attacks with a dramatic 8th inning home run. The Giants and Jets won their first games on the road, but were treated as the home teams with signs of love for New York visible across the stadiums in Kansas City and Foxborough. The Jets, being urged on by New York City Fireman Ed Anzalone, “fireman Ed”, were able to make the playoffs. The Giants played the first football game at home following the attacks and showed what a team and stadium of 80,000 people can do to brighten the spirits of a city.
And Even though the Yankees lost in the 7th game of the World Series, they gave New Yorkers three of the most dramatic nights in sports history with a first pitch from the President of the United States and back-to-back nights with game-tying ninth inning home runs and extra inning wins. All teams did this while showing their support by wearing the hats of the FDNY, NYPD and PAPD during their games.
The Jets and Giants were some of the first athletes to get to Ground Zero after the attacks and by doing so, demonstrated to others watching that, if these professional athletes are down there helping, maybe I can do something myself to help. It also gave the players an idea of what they meant to the fans of New York, and how much they were looked up to.
Those teams provided a place for people to gather and escape from what they were going through – if only for a few hours, it was still needed. Fans assembled in large numbers at stadiums around the city, all places that were deemed terrorist targets at the time. Sports gave complete strangers, who were in the same dilemma, a connection, and it helped keep memories alive of loved ones and acted as a form of therapy for others.
For the 10th anniversary of 9/11, with the NFL set to have its own pre-game ceremonies throughout the league, the Jets and Giants are involved in the largest tributes around the league. The Jets will don hats on the sideline with the FDNY insignia on them and will have the FDNY, NYPD and PAPD bagpipers perform Amazing Grace on the field. The stadium lights will be shut off at halftime for the start of another tribute created by 9/11 family members. The Giants will be playing in Washington – the site of the attack on the Pentagon on 9/11. And if Justin Tuck can play, I’m sure he will be wearing a New York Giants fireman helmet as he comes onto the field. The ceremonies commemorating 9/11 will be especially poignant for both teams. Although there are few players and coaches still associated with the Jets and Giants that were on the teams ten years ago, both teams still represent New York City. This Sunday will give everyone a sense of enjoyment, a coming together, something positive to share with one another for a couple of hours during a difficult time - the same thing that sports accomplished in the months following the attacks in 2001.
On this Sunday, we will be reminded of the significance of sports, not just as something to enjoy but also as a way to remember the past shared with family and friends. As my friend Mike Modafferi, the son of Rescue 5 Battalion Chief Louis Modafferi who died on 9/11, told me “Sports were something I could feel good about, it was a way of being close to him and keeping his memory alive because we both got so much enjoyment out of them. One of the reasons I love sports is because my father got me into them. When I go to games now, I think about being there with him.”
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Friday, August 19, 2011
Oakland Is MTC's Home And Should Stay That Way
As the San Francisco Bay Area talks about the economy, jobs, and spending, or more to the point wasteful spending, here we have the Metropolitan Transportation Commission, the MTC, in the Oakland office that's just a brisk 70-foot walk from Lake Merritt BART, moving out of that cool building on 8th and Oak Street, and spending, according to Oakland Local , $150 Million to build a new place - in San Francisco.
Oh, and a place that's so far from BART, compared to its current home, the Metropolitan Transportation Commission might as well change its name to the Boonies Transportation Commission.
What does the MTC have against Oakland? Drive-by shootings and robberies happen in San Francisco, too. You just don't read about them because the local media's brainwashed against reporting them. There is much to like about Oakland, not to mention the fact its more racially diverse than San Francisco, and finally has a decent set of restaurants and bars to frequent.
All of this, and more, including three sports teams, where San Francisco, technically, has one, and the MTC wants to leave Oakland.
Please, save the $150 Million for a more worthy objective than something so self-centered as this one.
Stay tuned.
Jersey Shore: Season 4 Episode 3
Last night was Jersday.
Mike wants a threesome with two blonde twins, but Deena stole one of the girls, then Vinny stole her and then Deena stole her back, but then Deena realized she's straight and she let the girl go back to Deena's bed.
Deena did almost hook up with a good looking Italian "lean cuisine," but the guys in the house were being jerks about it.
Situation and Snooki hooking up came to light, and Snooki denies it.
Snooki tells Ronnie that it's not the same without him and Sammi together and that they're meant to be. So he takes Sammi to a roof top beautiful romantic restaurant and the two get back together...yes, Ronnie and Sammi are dating again. This is the start of a lot of drama. Vinny even talks about how their relationship makes HIM want to kill himself:
Mike's twins are stalkers, they call call call and when Mike never answers Ronnie pretends to be Mike and brings them over.
Pigeons in Florence are crazy, because they just randomly attack inside the home even.
Pauly and Vinny played a lot of foosball.
Some things and Other Things-the Preseason#1 edition
By Dr. Bill Chahckes-Executive Editor-Football Reporters Online
Well it’s been awhile since we’ve written, so with the lockout firmly in the rear view mirror and pre-season well underway, here are some things to think about during a thunderstorm soaked northeastern U.S weekend.
Just when it seems Mike Vick’s issues are behind him, there he goes running his mouth again. His commenting on the Eagles being his third choice of team to mount his comeback from incarceration may or may not have any long term effect on his overall rising status as the “it” guy at QB in 2011, but it the short term, it has to have a few fans annoyed to say the least. Seems to me that Andy Reid and Joe Banner weren’t thinking too clearly when they went all “NY Yankees” in the shortened Free Agency period. Lots of personality there at the “linc”, maybe too much?
Speaking of the Eagles Free agent moves, WR Steve Smith didn’t waste any time cutting the cord with his former teammates and fans after signing his new contract to move down I-95. While he was very apologetic on his facebook page, he released a statement late last week clearly stating that the “NYG’s are now my enemies.” He also states that Giants head coach Tom Coughlin felt he had a “long way to go” but the doctors from both teams cleared him to begin preparing to play. Let’s see how much of that new contract he’ll earn before he re-injures himself. Not that I didn’t like Steve as a person, and I still do, once you get past the “Front” that this business makes players put up. I just think there are lots of stories out there about what happened with those contract discussions, and unless Steve or his agent decides to tell us directly, we’ll never know. Forget the posturing you heard on NY sports radio, there is a deeper truth here.
The new CBA and the landscape of free agency in the league has had a trickle down effect to other pro leagues, with the UFL contracting to four teams from five recently. It’s quite sad, because we’ll miss the Hartford Colonials franchise, staff, and players. While several of the Hartford players were selected in a “re-allocation” draft, players like Andre Dixon and Colt Brennan were left out to dry. We feel for them and wish them luck. Many have said that the NFL needs a developmental league similar to what they did with NFL Europe and the UFL would be a perfect fit.
To me, more pro football is good for the game and it’s fans.
The NFL Supplemental Draft was rescheduled for this coming Monday, August 22nd. Clearly the only storyline here that means anything to anyone is “where will Terrelle Pryor play in the NFL?” The NFL decided that Pryor will have to sit out five games, just as if he had returned to Ohio State to play his final season of college football. There are several dissenting opinions here, and we discussed it a bit on last night’s “FRO” show on Blogtalk Radio. Matt Marino is of the belief that what Pryor did in college should not have an impact on his pro career, but I believe Mr. Goodell and company needed to send the message out that ”college players who run afoul of the rules will not use the NFL as an escape hatch.” Still some NFLPA player reps have trouble agreeing on this methodology of punishment. If anyone remembers the actor Robert Blake from the 70’s hit TV show “BARETTA,” he had an opening line in the theme song “don’t do the crime if ya can’t do the time.” While most athletes beg for a chance to show they have the ability to play at the professional level, some guys from big time programs continue to live a life of supposed entitlement. Maybe they wouldn’t need to sell Jerseys for meal money if the NCAA gave them a stipend to live on each month. To me, Andrew Luck is starting to look even smarter then he is every day! For every “Ham” Newton, Matt Stafford and Sam Bradford out there, there are just as many Mike Barnard’s, Josh Harrison’s, and Mike Montoya’s who are waiting for their shot at the brass ring.
Let’s face it: while we love the game, the life expectancy of “Football Athletes “ is shortened by as much as 25 years due to numerous health issues from playing, from damaged joints, to traumatic Spine and Brain injuries. While the NFL is waking up to this cold hard fact, the players association keeps tweeting about how much money per active player goes into the health benefits program. (Nolan Harrison get over yourself please! The only person you making happy aside from yourself is Al Davis) But it’s a fraction of what is needed for the pre-1993 players. Lawsuits will continue to be filed, like the one involving Jim McMahon this week. The NCAA & the NFL are making an oil tanker full of money. Accept the fact that, yes, the players should know the risks, but no, no one bothered to tell them what those were. John Mackey passed away recently. We believe he died for the cause. Kudos should go out to the “Veteran Players” who support the retired players movement like Tony Gonzalez. They know they are only one step away from being in the same boat as Earl Campbell, Conrad Dolbler, and Brent Boyd.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Jersey Shore: Season 4 Episode 2
Last night was Jersday night, and now follows a review of the episode.
Jersey Shore cast in Florence, Italy has been quite entertaining. There were many interesting things that went on in last night's episode. So there are a few key moments that are worth mentioning (not in order of sequence in show):
1) At the very end of the episode Sammi is seen whispering into Ron's ear (as they both sit at a table and eat) that she wishes the two of them could go cuddle in bed. In a side commentary Ronnie says "F*** me in the A** with a spiked bat." The two fought a bit during the episode, but not as extreme as previous seasons. Ronnie was belligerently drunk and thought it was okay to talk about how he was bringing in some girl named Hannah. He told this to JWOWW, but JWOWW knew it was better not to tell Sammi. Drunk Sammi wanted to talk to Ronnie and followed him around the club asking him to be friends; Deena tries to squash that. Also, Sammi tells Ronny that she loves him and it looks like Ronnie is crying.
2) The cast will be working at a pizzeria in Florence. Snooki was asked to be the example to make the pizza. It seems like it will be very interesting watching them work at an Italian Pizza Shop speaking little Italian. The guy showing them how to make the pizzas says he will only show it once and will take no questions. When Snooki says she wants "pepperoni" pizza he asks if she means salami or peppers.
3) The Vatican is not in Florence, but try telling that to the cast. Deena and Sammi think that they spot the Vatican and then Ronnie says that Leonardo Da Vinci painted the ceiling in the Vatican - which is also false. The Vatican is in Rome and Michaelangelo painted the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.
4) "Making coffee in Italy is like making coffee in the 1600s." JWOWW attempts to make coffee, and it turns out to be very messy.
5) Pauly D and Deena have an odd relationship. He throws Deena under the bus when he tells Situation how she told everyone about Mike's failed cuddling attempts which he denies. Later, Pauly buys her a bracelet to show that he is sorry. The episode opens with the two making out, but Pauly D doesn't look like he's enjoying it much at all.
6) Snooki's boyfriend gets upset that she hasn't called, and The Situation tries to console her saying that the two of them have always had a connection...right. He later has sex with a girl from Florida, well not sex, more for him than for her. She is not very attractive and Snooki continually asks Vinny if he finds her prettier than the Florida girl.
7) The girls in Italy are allowed to drink young; so Pauly D and Vinny come up with some funny "She's too young for you if..." liners for the girls. It turns into a fun game for them.
8) The girls plan to cook an elaborate chicken Sunday dinner, and prepare everything, but then just peace out and go eat somewhere else. It is JWOWW, Sammi and Deena - no mention of where Snooki is. The girls also made the dishwasher overflow and cause suds on the kitchen floor.
The previews show that there will be more fights in even more epic proportions, and the house will somehow become divided.
9) The police in Italy are strict when it comes to being drunk in public, and when Sammi is walking a very drunk Deena back home she sees police and tells Deena to act normal. This works out great, but the second Deena steps in the house she face plants.
10) Ronnie and Vinny in the hot tub is great and funny. The hot tub changes colors, and has a way of pushing the two people in the tub toward one another. The two keep being pushed toward one another and it is awkward and amusing. The camera keeps cutting away to an angel statue that is watching the two. Ronnie makes it clear that this is definitely a tub for a boy and a girl.
All photos courtesy of MTV.
This season will be very eventful - the previews show more fights and a house divided.
Bouncing In Boots For Your Booty
HI Your Fit Day Friends!
Hey! Do you still want to get that sexy summer bod?
Or, maybe you're on the rebound from a joint injury...
Or, maybe you're just looking for that cool piece of equipment that is super fun and will get you fit and lean in a short amount of time...
Or, you just like toys!
OK! So, remember I told you that I would find ways to work out to keep me in super duper shape before my pending hip surgery?
Well, I had this super idea that I could design running shoes with springs on the bottom that would take the impact off my joints and it would be less painful to walk and super fun to use, as well as keep my booty in shape. But then I said, "Hmm! Why invent the wheel when somebody else has done the work for me? Why not ask the Kangoo Jump people to help me?"
So that's what I did.
And I think these Boots were made for YOU!
Boots Not Just Made For Walking!
My first try with the Kangoo jumps was back in June. It had been raining the last couple weeks in May so I had to put trying the boots out on hold. But finally the clouds separated, and the sun shined through and I got off my ball ( I use a stability ball as my desk chair) and decided to hop down to the Lake. No, I hadn't put the boots on just yet. That was actually a pun. And since it takes too long to hobble on my hip, I got in my car and headed 4 blocks to Lake Merritt.
"Another Lake Merrit July Drama Sunset"
But something compelled me to take a detour and instead I drove over to the Piedmont High School track where there wouldn't be any stray ducks, dogs or pelicans underfoot; I could count on level ground; and there was no chance of bouncing into the lake...with the pelicans.
"Pelicans at Lake Merritt, Oakland, CA"
I'll tell you this: in retrospect, walking down the steps to the track in my Chaco sandals and getting onto the track was actually the hardest part. Because once I put on the Kangoo Jumps it was shear joy to 'walk' and 'run' and just be able to amble pain free.
Check These Out
All Kangoos are a cool, ninja, space age ski/roller blade-like boot design with cambered curved springs on the bottom. And they're reasonably light, and lighter than roller blades-well, at least my roller blades-with just enough weight to give you the right amount of stability and a good workout. I mean, you're still lifting boots with every hop!
"My feet in Kangoo Jumps"
Getting into them was pretty quick and easy. Adjusting the cleats no problem. Figuring out the pressure to secure them was hit or miss and I probably will need a few more romps before they feel comfortable around the shin.
The track wasn't crowed but just carrying the boots in my hand drew attention to me. I wasn't going to complain about that. I'm a fitness diva, remember!
In fact, I'm hoping that I can get more people involved in using these boots and coming to my bootcamps. (HA! HA! Boot Camps! Kangoo Style!)
Once I had them securely on my feet I was like the Jolly Green Giant. I was amazed at how stable they were. Everyone kept asking me if I felt like I would topple over or twist my ankle. Absolutely NOT. Have you ever felt like you would fall over in ski boots? (assuming the ski is not attached to the boot and you're not ripping down a mountain). There is absolutely no inclination to fall over. And that is a good thing! seeing that I'm only planning on having ONE surgery.
Giving It a Go On My Kangoo Jumps
Because this was my first adventure out in my Kangoos I didn't want to over do it. They say to hop around, up and down, break them in. So I tried that, but was pretty tentative, babying my hip. But I soon realized that the boots actually roll you forward and the impact isn't directly on your hip. So I became more bold, and set off down the track... at a slow run. And behold, I was bouncing with no burn in my joint.
The track is 1/4 mile around. After three times around-running, walking, hopping, and repeating that-I was already working up a sweat and I could feel my running muscles in my legs-the ones I hadn't worked in that running way since December '10- start to come alive. I felt alive! And free........
I spent 15 minutes Kangooing and by the time I stopped I felt like I had instead sprinted up a mountain. It was that good of a workout and my legs and glutes felt pumped. All without any pain in my hip joint. In fact, my hip feels better in these boots running and walking than I do ambling, or more like hobbling right now, on my own two feet, whether in my shoes or Vibram 5 Fingers.
Here's a video of me in San Francisco bouncing in my boots:
Putting The Spring Back Into Your Life
The Kangoo Jumps are designed to take up to 80% of the impact off your joints. So for those of you who have osteoarthritis in your hips or knees (I'm not sure about back pain but you can check out their website) and have had to give up your favorite sport or activity you may have a second chance. So I highly recommend these Kangoo Jumps for anyone who has had to give up their favorite impact activity, things like hiking, trekking, and even martial arts, due to joint pain in their knees and hips and possibly back. Because you can do all of these sports in Kangoo Boots. Obviously do your research and consult with your doctor first. I certainly did before I started using them.
In fact, I contacted one of the leading hip surgeons in the world, Dr. Koen De Smet, to get his opinion and approval. And after he reviewed the website he said that they were suitable for what I wanted to do, and as long as it I didn't hurt I was fine.
Boots for your Booty
I have to admit I was getting a bit soft in the inner thigh and butt since I wasn't able to run in the hills or do any of the sprint training that I love to do for the past several months. But in the past month I have seen a noticeable difference in the tone of my inner thighs, quads and butt and the Kangoo jumps have miraculously toned up my legs in just this short amount of time.
And here's a bonus for those of you who have some extra weight to lose: They say that you burn twice as many calories using the Kangoo Boots and that 30 minutes in your Kangoos is like an hour in your normal training shoes. That's not hard to believe. After bouncing around San Francisco and Lake Merritt for just 30 minutes a pop these past few weeks it felt like I had done a six mile trail run in the Berkeley hills.
So, not only are these a great workout, burn calories, tone up your booty, and are a hoot to use, they are a time saver as well. What's not to like about them!
What's Next ?
So, my game plan is to Kangoo Jump for the next two months which will take me up to the week that I leave for overseas for my hip surgery. There will be no more Kangoo jumping for at least 10 months after surgery. But I'll have other exercises that I will be doing to keep our butts in shape, literally!
So be sure to follow my blog, and watch the videos, for more cool stuff that will keep your legs toned, your booty nice and round, and your body fit and lean.
Stay tuned for more Kangoo Jump videos so you can get the 'JUMP on fitness!'
Your Trainer, and Nutrition and Wellness Coach,
DebbyK!
Make it Your Fit Day...
Tuesday, August 09, 2011
Casey Anthony's Media Coverage Part 2: Social Media.
Originally Posted Here
Although it has been almost a month since the verdict of the Casey Anthony trial was released there are still sources covering her, and I think that the best time for me to analyze the way the media covered her trial and her as a person is once all the press has died down; it has given me the ability to fully analyze and understand how each outlet, certain anchors, reporters, bloggers, etc. reacted to the trial and so forth.
Even celebrities, such as Kim Kardashian, got involved and opened up with how they truly felt.
A lot of people didn't follow the trial until the very last weeks/days before the verdict. The whole situation has been a social media extravaganza and shows how much the technological world has truly progressed. Back in the time of OJ Simpson's trial there was no Facebook, Twitter, etc. There wasn't even a Myspace; Casey Anthony wasn't so lucky. Mass amounts of people have been able to come together and discuss all about how they feel - and those people were mostly influenced by news sources.
It seems like a very difficult thing to do; to objectively cover such a story. Not meaning to draw this series out, but my next post will truly get down to the nitty gritty and analyze the mass media's way of covering Casey Anthony.
Although it has been almost a month since the verdict of the Casey Anthony trial was released there are still sources covering her, and I think that the best time for me to analyze the way the media covered her trial and her as a person is once all the press has died down; it has given me the ability to fully analyze and understand how each outlet, certain anchors, reporters, bloggers, etc. reacted to the trial and so forth.
Even celebrities, such as Kim Kardashian, got involved and opened up with how they truly felt.
A lot of people didn't follow the trial until the very last weeks/days before the verdict. The whole situation has been a social media extravaganza and shows how much the technological world has truly progressed. Back in the time of OJ Simpson's trial there was no Facebook, Twitter, etc. There wasn't even a Myspace; Casey Anthony wasn't so lucky. Mass amounts of people have been able to come together and discuss all about how they feel - and those people were mostly influenced by news sources.
It seems like a very difficult thing to do; to objectively cover such a story. Not meaning to draw this series out, but my next post will truly get down to the nitty gritty and analyze the mass media's way of covering Casey Anthony.
Monday, August 08, 2011
Depression and its effect on your sexual relationship by Dr. Christina Villarreal
The hallmark of most new romantic relationships is a passionate physical connection. But when one or both partners suffer from clinical depression, a couple's sexual chemistry can suffer. Approximately 35 to 47 percent of people with clinical depression report having sexual problems. Sexual problems worsen depending on the severity of one's depression; sixty one percent of people with severe depression report having sexual problems. In my practice as a clinical psychologist, problematic sexual functioning is a common complaint of people seeking treatment for depression and anxiety.
What leads to the reduction of sexual functioning in those experiencing depression?
The human brain is the body’s most powerful "sex organ." Sexual desire begins in the brain, shaping our thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Chemicals in the brain called neurotransmitters help brain cells communicate with each other in order to stimulate blood flow to the sex organs. In a depressed person, their neurotransmitters are out of balance, which can lead to diminished sexual desire. In addition, low levels neurotransmitters can dull a person's ability to experience pleasure, both physical and emotional.
Are men and women's sexual functioning affected differently by depression?
Both men and women suffering from depression describe experiencing a host of the following symptoms:
-intense sadness that inhibits one's ability to carry out daily activities
-loss of interest in things that were previously enjoyable
-changes in appetite, weight, and/or sleep patterns
-feelings of guilt, irritability and worthlessness
-loss of energy, feeling slowed down, or 'keyed up'
-impaired concentration
-thoughts of death or suicide.
But some important gender differences may be found in how people experience depression. Many men fail to identify themselves as clinically depressed because they don't relate to feeling sadness. Their depressive symptoms may only include feelings of tiredness, inability to concentrate or sleep well, hopelessness, as well and loss of interest or pleasure- all of which may be associated with loss of libido and erection problems.
For women, depression can commonly be experienced as feelings of sadness, feeling physically slowed down, worthlessness, and/or guilt along with loss of interest or pleasure- all of which can lead to lack of interest in sex and/or difficulty in reaching orgasm.
Helpful tips in coping with a relationship impacted by depression:
Seek out professional consultation. Many people are reticent to reach out for professional help because they feel they ought to be able to overcome problems on their own, or worry about the financial or time commitment of psychotherapy. But an experienced mental health professional will be able to use their expertise to establish what type of support and resources are best suited for you, given your personal, familial and medical history. A consultation can typically take place in 1-3 visits, after which, you should have a clear picture of what your options are for improvement. Evidence-based treatment such as Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) may be suggested for you, a widely accepted form of treatment for clinical depression.
Try to avoid saying "I know what you're going through" to your partner. You don’t. Instead, try: 'I can't know exactly how you're feeling, but I am trying very hard to understand and help.'
Take care of yourself. Being in a relationship with a depressed person can be incredibly taxing, so make sure you do whatever it is that helps you feel healthy and happy. See friends, get in touch with your body through enjoyable physical activity, pursue your own interests and goals, and spend some time away from your partner. Depressed people often want to stay home and/or isolate themselves from the world. If you attempt to join them in this pattern, you're sure to end up feeling badly too.
Try not to take your partner's lack of sexual interest personally. This is crucial to staying invested in making the relationship work. If you come to believe that your partner will not ever regain their sexual interest, you may end up terminating the relationship before determining if treatment can help.
If you are interested in learning more about this topic, please join Dr. Villarreal, who will be co-leading a free workshop hosted by Nenna Joiner at Feelmore510 , an adult retail boutique located in the Uptown District of downtown Oakland, CA. Workshop will take place Sunday, August 14th from 2-5 pm. Both single adults and couples welcome. Professional referrals and inquires may be made at www.drchristinavillarreal.com
Wednesday, August 03, 2011
Safeway Rockridge Oakland - A Talk With Ken Lowney
The controversial proposal to build a new, expanded Safeway Rockridge Oakland complex has gone on for something like five years and three major design changes. The last time I weighed in on this design, it was because the product was awful. This time that's changed, as has the economic climate.
I talked to Ken Lowney, of Lowney and Associates Architects about what I think is an exciting new design that adds up to be a net plus for Rockridge. It also has the added advantage of having been created by a person in Mr. Lowney who actually lives in Rockridge. Because of that, "it's a very personal project for me," he says.
As the video shows, the new Safeway Rockridge Oakland is a far cry from the original plan. It actually fits and conforms to its surroundings, and provides a gift in the form of a triangular over-look cafe on the corner of Claremont and College Avenue.
But that's design; my background is in city planning, and my specialization is in urban economic development. The fact is that, in a Bay Area with double-digit unemployment in many counties, and hovering between 15 percent and 17 percent in Oakland, we need to build this complex.
It's not 2008 any more. We're in the middle of a massive Worldwide credit crunch that not only shows no signs of loosening up, it's buttressed by a terrible virus of anti-spending rhetoric, the timing of which is so bad it may plunge this economy into recession.
It's time to change our views and make sure that we in Oakland have as much new business in the economic pipeline as possible.
Please support this project.
Ashley Hebert Bachelorette Blog Gets Race-Hate Emails
Yesterday's Zennie62Blog.com blog called " Ashley Hebert, Bachelorette Picks White Guy From Group Of White Guys" where I blasted the show for failing to have a diverse cast like that of Big Brother, the CBS show which won the Sunday ratings race over the ABC show, got some racist emails.
Say, one good thing, the men who wrote like Ashley Hebert. But if she were to be seen with a black guy, I suppose all that would end. Sad - for them. The civilized World doesn't care at all.
One person, who didn't read my blog post well at all, wanted me to defend all-black shows, even though I wrote this:
Once I reminded him of that paragraph, he became a different person and calmed down. But that written, I do like BET. Moreover, I didn't say I disliked the Bachelorette as a concept, just how it's produced.
One thing I'll say, is that man who sent the email - and the emails were all from men and presumably white, given their stance and anger, as I didn't ask for a photo - didn't use the N-word, and seemed capable of a reasonable exchange. But he was the only person for which that was the case, and the others I didn't bother.
Like Larry Kyper who's email is muslimscum@inorbit.com This is what Larry sent:
Whatever.
I could fill up this post with more examples - oh, why not one more.
I present to you, David D. Huff who's at david.huff@computer-critters.com, and according to a search that took all of 3 minutes, the President of Computer Critters Inc of Hudson, Ohio (Interesting how many of these emails come from companies, which shows you what some people do at work, not to mention gives you a window into what that cubicle worker might think about you, especially if you're black.)
Here's Mr. Huff:
Tangle? Wild, man.
As is evident by these, and other emails - and I will "out" people who send communications that express race hatred - there are people who can't stand the diverse American society around them. It's important to know who these folks are, because we don't want to see a repeat of the Oslo, Norway shooting on American soil.
I hold out hope that these men, and the others, have better hearts than reflected to me. I also hope the Bachelorette producers, and ABC, can see how they're playing into the racist desires of some in America.
Time to stop.
Stay tuned.
Say, one good thing, the men who wrote like Ashley Hebert. But if she were to be seen with a black guy, I suppose all that would end. Sad - for them. The civilized World doesn't care at all.
One person, who didn't read my blog post well at all, wanted me to defend all-black shows, even though I wrote this:
And in case you’re wondering, if The Bachelorette was all black, I’d say the same thing. I don’t like racial segregation, or television programs that quietly promote it via the images shown, although I do support the need for America to see a slice of black life in the USA, given the history of discrimination that’s worked to keep such images off TV, that is, until the last 30 years. (But even then, you can’t tell the African American story is a racist vacuum. It just doesn’t hold water.)
Once I reminded him of that paragraph, he became a different person and calmed down. But that written, I do like BET. Moreover, I didn't say I disliked the Bachelorette as a concept, just how it's produced.
One thing I'll say, is that man who sent the email - and the emails were all from men and presumably white, given their stance and anger, as I didn't ask for a photo - didn't use the N-word, and seemed capable of a reasonable exchange. But he was the only person for which that was the case, and the others I didn't bother.
Like Larry Kyper who's email is muslimscum@inorbit.com This is what Larry sent:
Hey you forgot one more possibility. Maybe she doesn't care to breed with a fucking NIGGER.
Or be beat, cut ,slashed, murdered or simply have a useless APE lying around her home getting
ready to put an end to her credit rating. You niggers see racism everywhere you look.
You niggers seem to forget you represent only 13% of the population that means we should
only have to see 13 niggers for every 100 beautiful White personypu see on TV. What more do you want,
ALL of daytime TV is devoted to niggers who else is sitting at home watching the idiot box while people
are supposed to be at WORK. Worthless niggers of course.
Whatever.
I could fill up this post with more examples - oh, why not one more.
I present to you, David D. Huff who's at david.huff@computer-critters.com, and according to a search that took all of 3 minutes, the President of Computer Critters Inc of Hudson, Ohio (Interesting how many of these emails come from companies, which shows you what some people do at work, not to mention gives you a window into what that cubicle worker might think about you, especially if you're black.)
Here's Mr. Huff:
WTF BOY sounds like you got a personal problem, you got niggers in every TV program.
Take the hint BOY she is white she wants a WHITE MAN!
Take to heart and pray to God we never tangle.
Tangle? Wild, man.
As is evident by these, and other emails - and I will "out" people who send communications that express race hatred - there are people who can't stand the diverse American society around them. It's important to know who these folks are, because we don't want to see a repeat of the Oslo, Norway shooting on American soil.
I hold out hope that these men, and the others, have better hearts than reflected to me. I also hope the Bachelorette producers, and ABC, can see how they're playing into the racist desires of some in America.
Time to stop.
Stay tuned.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)