Sex rehab for sexual addiction: What is it, and how does it work?

With all the celebrities that have admitted themselves into ‘sex rehab’ centers recently, you might be curious about what goes on there. How does sex rehab work? Is it effective, or is this just an excuse to ask others for forgiveness? You might even scoff at the idea that someone needs to enter a sex rehab center. Perhaps you believe all they really need to do is come clean and stop cheating on their significant other, or choose to live a single life so as to not hurt others with lies and increased exposure to sexually transmitted diseases. This article serves to explain what sexual rehabilitation or ‘sex rehab’ is, and how a person with a sexual addiction might benefit from this form of treatment.

Treatment for sexual addiction tends to focus on two main areas:

1) Separating the addict from opportunities to continue harmful sexual patterns of behavior, much in the same way drug addicts need to be separated from their drug-filled lifestyle. This is why inpatient or residential treatment is often the suggested setting. An inpatient setting provides a controlled setting, which aims to eliminate opportunities for compulsive behavior.

2) Utilization of a safe, therapeutic setting with trained professionals to help individuals begin to face the guilt, shame and depression that is common amongst sexual addicts.

Sexual rehabilitation centers may vary in the variety of psychological treatment modalities they provide, but this list contains a broad overview of therapeutic strategies that have proven to be effective at helping people overcome sexual addiction.

12-Step Programs. Sexaholics Anonymous (SA) is a 12 step program which utilizes principles similar to those used in other addiction programs, such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and Narcotics Anonymous (NA.) However, unlike AA, where the goal is complete abstinence from all alcohol, SA pursues abstinence only from compulsive, destructive sexual behavior. By admitting powerlessness over their addiction, seeking the help of God or a higher power, working the 12 different steps, seeking a sponsor and attending meetings consistently, many addicts have been able to regain intimacy in their personal relationships.

Cognitive-Behavior Therapy (CBT).
This form of therapy helps people to examine the relationship between their thoughts, feelings and behaviors as they relate to their addictive patterns. By targeting the triggers and reinforcers that perpetuate the addictive pattern, people can begin to short-circuit the process and make healthy changes. Treatment can include teaching addicts therapeutic tools such as thought stopping, behavioral substitution, and thought record keeping, as a means to prevent the relapse of addictive patterns.

Interpersonal Therapy. Traditional "talk therapy" or counseling with an individual therapist can be helpful in providing a space for individuals to sort through past experiences that shaped addictive behavior, as well as manage mood symptoms, increase the ability to cope with stressors, and learn healthier lifestyle patterns and behaviors.

Group Therapy
Group therapy typically consists mental health professional(s) facilitating a group of people that engage in dialogue around addiction issues, and learn from related psychoeducational materials. A group environment is thought to enable people to learn from others’ experiences, strengths and relapses. It is also an ideal setting for people to learn through the confrontation of denial and rationalizations common among addicts in various stages of their rehabilitation.

Medication
Recent developments in the literature suggest that certain psychotropic medications (antidepressants) may prove to be useful for many people in managing sexual addiction. In addition to treating mood symptoms common among sex addicts, these medications may have some benefit in reducing sexual obsessions and ruminations.

This article was composed by Dr. Christina Villarreal, Clinical Psychologist in Oakland, CA

References

1 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_addiction_
2 The National Council on Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity - www.ncsac.org and www.sash.net
3 Defense Security Services - www.dss.mil
4 Patrick Carnes (1991). Don't call it love: Recovery from sexual addiction, (New York: Bantam, pp. 22-23, 30-34).
5 Michael Herkov, Ph.D., Mark S. Gold, M.D., and Drew W. Edwards, M.S., Feb 2001

YouTube is down again as of 5:01 PM PST

For some reason, and for the second time in less than a week, the top video sharing and distribution site YouTube.com is down again.

As of 5:01 PM PSY a "Http/1.1 Service Unavailable" note appeared when one tries to go to http://www.youtube.com/

YouTube went down last Thursday morning, but the matter was quickly resolved.

There's no word via email by YouTube on this. This also happens to be the day when YouTube was installing a major make-over to its video pages, including Zennie62.

Stay tuned.

Sandra Bullock news: Jesse James Nazi Picture is out

In the latest update in the Sandra Bullock and Jesse James cheating scandal, we can report this Sandra Bullock news: the Jesse James Nazi Picture is out.

The photo that was long rumored to exist – one of Bullock's husband Jesse James in Nazi gear and giving the salute – has surfaced at TMZ.com and US Weekly.

For those of you who need a backstory, the quick version is that Jesse James allegedly had affairs with as many as five women: Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, Melissa Smith, Brigitte Daguerre, and a fourth and fifth woman, both who declined to identify themselves at this time.

But the photo, which this blogger had hoped did not exist, does, even though it took a week for TMZ to produce it.

The guess is they didn't want to be caught in another hoax. But the photo, which is two years old according to TMZ, shows Jesse James wearing a Waffen SS visor and striking the "sieg heil" salute. There's also a german model airplane next to him. Where it was taken, TMZ does not know.

What the hell was Jesse James thinking?

Stay tuned.

French version:

Mindy Lawton and Jamie Jungers, Tiger Woods mistresses, in Vanity Fair

Related searches: loredana jolie ferriolo, vanity fair, vanity, vanity fair tiger woods, daily mail showbiz

Mindy Lawton 

Now that Tiger Woods, the World's Greatest Golfer, has made a public apology for his 12 or 14 mistresses and affairs, and gave a five-minute interview to ESPN and The Golf Channel, it seems Tiger Woods' mistresses are surfacing to fill-in the blanks created in Tiger's statements.

But statements by Mindy Lawton and Jamie Jungers, Tiger Woods Mistress Number 6 and Number 4 respectively, are a doozy.

In his Golf Channel interview, Tiger Woods claimed that...

"It was all me. I'm the one who did it. I'm the one who acted the way I acted. No one knew what was going on when it was going on. I'm sure if more people would have known in my inner circle, they would have stopped it or tried to put a stop to it. But I kept it all to myself."

But Mindy Lawton and Jamie Jungers are to be believed, and there's no reason to think not, Tiger Woods is not telling the truth. According to Vanity Fair, and a preview of an article by Mark Seal, Mindy Lawton says that when the National Enquirer approached her regarding her affair (an event mentioned last December in this space), Tiger Woods directed Lawton to call his agent IMG's Mark Steinberg who said "We'll take care of it."

Jamie Jungers told Vanity Fair that she would schedule meetup with Tiger Woods through Byron Bell, Woods, childhood friend and the President of Tiger Woods Design.

Beyond that, what Mark Seal writes is essentially a rehash of a lot of information about Tiger woods mistresses that appeared in blogs, like Zennie62. The info on Tiger Woods gambling habits has been mentioned before, but in a whisper.

What Vanity Fair's Seal does is take all of the history - well, most of it - and put it into one complete article. The revelation that Tiger Woods' agent and managers were essentially involved in the maintenance of his affairs is new and damaging.

Can't help but wonder what Tiger Woods Wife Elin Nordegren thinks of all of this.

Ricky Martin coming out as gay: 6 stages for understanding the emotional process

After years of fighting off rumors about his sexuality, Latin singer Ricky Martin has finally just posted the following message on his official Web site, coming out and telling the world he is gay.

"Today is my day, this is my time, and this is my moment. These years in silence and reflection made me stronger and reminded me that acceptance has to come from within and that this kind of truth gives me the power to conquer emotions I didn't even know existed ... I am proud to say that I am a fortunate homosexual man. I am very blessed to be who I am," he wrote.

Coming out as gay, lesbian bisexual or transgendered is a process that for many, is experienced in stages of change. While there are different models and theories about coming out, the six-step process (The Model of Homosexuality Identity Formation) was created by psychological theorist Vivienne Cass in 1979 and is still an accepted model for understanding the experience. While many will not experience these steps in a linear course, the following steps capture essential components of the coming out process. These steps are not necessarily mutually exclusive, and can be experienced simultaneously. For example other theorists have said that it is not uncommon for people go back and forth in their sexual identity development.

Step One: Identity Confusion
"Who am I?" is the major question in this step. People in this stage of the coming out process start to notice their attraction to same-sex people and really question what it means. Am I gay? Am I a lesbian? Am I transgendered? Am I bisexual? Within this stage there may be a denial of inner feelings as a person continues to see themselves as a member of the mainstream, heterosexual population. Some may consider their behaviors as ‘just experimenting’. Some people in this stage might keep emotional involvement separate from their sexual activity; others may choose to have deeply emotional relationships that are non-sexual.

Step Two: Identity Comparison
At this stage, a person may try to find an explanation for why they are having the feelings they are experiencing. "Maybe I am gay. Or maybe I'm bisexual." Feelings of isolation & alienation are common in this stage. A person might wonder "Is this a phase?" "Am I only attracted to this one same sex person, or is this going to be a permanent trend?"

Step Three: Identity Tolerance
In this stage, a person might begin to accept identifying as gay, lesbian or transgendered or bisexual. Some might come to terms with some parts of being gay, but not fully embrace it. For example, one might accept participating in sexual activity with a woman and consider it okay, but may not be ready to identity as lesbian or bisexual in public, leading a ‘double life.’ Or a man may come to accept that he has fallen in love with another man, but considers this an isolated situation. At this stage, it is common for people to seek out a gay/lesbian/bi-sexual community or social group as a way to explore or experience identifying with other people of the same sexual orientation as a means for support.

Step Four: Identity Acceptance
In this stage a person has begun to accept, rather than just tolerate their sexual identity. People often begin forming friendships with other gay, lesbian, transgendered or bisexual people. Many begin to realize that being lesbian or bisexual is acceptable, and that their life can and will be happy and fulfilling. At this stage, it is common to begin coming out to a few trusted individuals.

Step Five: Identity Pride
People who are in this stage feel a sense of pride of their sexual orientation, and feel comfortable interacting in gay communities. They start coming out to others in their lives, by making their sexual orientation publicly known. It’s also common for people to feel angry and resentful about the lack of legal and social rights that gay and lesbian people experience. Some people may get involved in gay and lesbian activism. Others may feel the need to isolate.

Step Six: Identity Synthesis
In this stage, a person’s sexual orientation is integrated into their whole identity. For many, this includes a holistic view of the self and people often feel equally comfortable in straight and gay, lesbian, transgendered or bi-sexual environments.



This article was composed by Dr. Christina Villarreal, Clinical Psychologist in Oakland, CA

Sandra Bullock news: Jesse James in rehab at Arizona's Sierra Tucson

In this follow-up to the earlier blog post on Sandra Bullock's husband Jesse James, we learn the real reason Jesse James was driving to Arizona when a California Highway Patrol Officer stopped him for driving his tinted-window Mercedez Benz without a front license plate: it was to save his marriage by checking into a rehab clinic called Sierra Tuscon, according to TMZ.com.

The trouble is, Sierra Tucson appears to have violated state and federal law in sharing information on Jesse James.

The Sierra Tuscon website reports that the organization provides...

..individualized treatment for the following addictions, mental health issues, and chronic pain: Coexisting Disorders, Trauma & Abuse, Depression, Sexual Addiction/Compulsivity Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Eating Disorders, Drug Addiction, Alcohol Addiction, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Bipolar Disorder, Pain Management..

Let's hope Jesse James is getting quality care. In October of 2009, Sierra Tuscon was fined $3,500 for discharging a patient with "a history of psychosis" and harboring "suicidal thoughts." In fairness, Sierra Tuscon said it responded "swiftly" to the matter last year.

TMZ reports that it called Sierra Tuscon and...

and spoke with a therapist, who told us Jesse was at the facility and in fact had a 6 PM treatment.

If this is the case, Sierra Tucson has violated its own privacy and confidentiality statements, which read as follows:

Sierra Tucson respects the privacy of its users. Sierra Tucson does not sell, rent, or loan any identifiable information regarding its customers or website visitors to any third party. Any information you give us is held with the utmost care and will not be used in ways for which you have not consented.

And...

Sierra Tucson's commitment to each patient's confidentiality is ensured by our legal responsibility as mandated by state and federal law (including 42 CFR Part 2). Each staff member is dedicated to upholding these standards in all communications and records. Staff, patients, family members, and visitors all sign a confidentiality statement and agree to keep all knowledge or information of Sierra Tucson staff, patients, and family members confidential at all times. We go to great lengths to protect the anonymity of everyone who enters Sierra Tucson.

"We go to great lengths to protect the anonymity of everyone who enters Sierra Tucson."

Really? OK. Someone at Sierra Tucson just violated state and federal law in giving TMZ the information the news site reported.

Stay tuned.

Sandra Bullock news: Jesse James mistress number five?

The story of Oscar-winner Sandra Bullock and her husband Jesse James has taken a new twist. Unbelievably and sadly, RadarOnline.com has just issued a shocking blog post 20 minutes ago that it's on alert for an alleged fifth mistress of Jesse James to reveal herself.

A source told the TMZ.com online rival publication that the woman has been "consulting attorneys and PR the past few days", and may make a public appearance this week.

Looking to make money from her association with Jesse James, the woman has reportedly been turned down (yeah!) by several PR representatives. RadarOnline explains that the story's "White Power" element is just not for them.

But even with that, the question is, does this alleged fifth mistresses have some kind of white supremacist angle too? Hopefully, for Jesse James, who's reportedly trying to save his marriage, mistresses number four and five turn out to be nothing more than hot air, and that only Michelle "Bombshell" McGee has the Nazi-bikini photos.

Stay tuned.

Santonio Holmes criminal case closed; Mills called Holmes N-word?

The criminal case against Pittsburgh Steelers Wide Receiver Santonio Holmes is closed. Now, in what is just a completely whacked episode, there are reports that Holmes accuser of a March 7th assault, Anshoenoe Mills, called Holmes the N-word, then was later seen by a police officer "smiling and rubbing Holmes' face" after she talked to Orlando Police.

Mills claimed Holmes threw a bottle at her, but until today there were no reports why a bottle would have been thrown. The whole argument was reportedly started over a VIP seat in the establishment.

According to TMZ.com and Profootballtalk.com, the police report has it that the off-duty officer on the scene at Club Rain in Orlando talked to both Holmes and Anshoenoe Mills outside the club and was told two completely opposing stories. What's weird is after the two stories were told and Mills declined to file charges, Orlando police filed charges against Holmes anyway.

Profootballtalk reports this part of the police report raises a lot of questions:

"This officer observed Mills smiling and rubbing Holmes face just moments after walking off together," the report continued. "Five minutes later the two returned and Mills advised this officer that they had resolved the matter and that she did not wish to press charges or get Holmes into any trouble. Mills had a small abrasion that was less than 1/4' [''] over her right eye. She refused medical attention. Mills wrote a sworn written statement in which she declined to prosecute."

Moreover Santonio Holmes has claimed that it was someone else who threw a bottle at Mills, not him. According to TMZ.com, which reports the N-word matter, Holmes says that Mills started the entire incident by grabbing his wrist and calling him the N-word.

It's a case of he said, she said, racism either real or imagined, perhaps cocktail consumption, and an Orlando police report that may not have been filed in a timely manner. Moreover, Anshoenoe Mills is black, but contrary to the view of some in American society, there are blacks like this blogger who will not stand for being called the N-word by anyone, regardless of color.

Mills does not help her case, criminal or civil, with this profile post on Black Planet:

Here's a little information about Anshonae Ashley. Im very optimistic and love to try new things. My favorite food is spaghetti. I love animals. I love to laugh...its good for the soul. I love to eat, but hate to gain weight. I am originally from Jacksonville, but I live in Orlando for school. I attend the University of Central Florida. Im majoring in Forensic Science with a minor in Chemistry. I have two beautiful poodles. I dont want to grow up. Im an adrenaline junky. My personality is contagious. I never stop smiling. I laugh when no one is laughing. I hate being called Ann or Shonae. Im not usually a b*tch, but i can be. Nothing annoys me more than lame people. So if you are lame...please..go to another page. I love money. I love to live. I love to love. I'd love being done with this sh*t!...so if you want to know more about me (bullsh*t aside) ask! Oh and one more thing...if you don't have anything to offer me....save me the time and don't send me any messages. If you can't handle that...you probably can't handle this!!!

Regardless of the outcome of the civil case, this is one area where Santonio Holmes could have avoided being The Angry Black Guy in arguing with Mills, found his inner Frank Sinatra (especially since it was Oscar Sunday), defended a woman who was the apparent target of a flying bottle, and just let the lady have the VIP seat.  One would think he's got enough money such that it wouldn't matter, but this proves money can't buy happiness.

Oakland A's Stadium News: Field of Schemes wrong, as usual

The news that Major League Baseball's "blue-ribbon" committee or "Gang of three" is set to recommend the Oakland Athletics Baseball Organization move to San Jose from Oakland apparently upset some unknown blogger at the website Field of Schemes, which wrongly assumes that every sports stadium deal is a bad one. This blogger figured why not have some fun and give Field of Schemes some Internet traffic light at the same time.

Field of Schemes writes:

That Selig's Gang of Three would recommend San Jose as an A's destination, if true, wouldn't be surprising, given its further-ahead stadium deal and relatively untapped market

Writing that the San Jose Market Area is "relatively untapped" proves Field of Schemes doesn't know the San Francisco Bay Area, the San Francisco Giants Market Area, or is just plain confused. I'd select the last one, because then the Field of Schemes blogger writes...

..the bigger question remains what price Selig will make A's owner Lew Wolff have to pay to the San Francisco Giants if he wants to get a deal done.

At least the blogger over there realized perhaps half way through his blog as he was writing it, it seems, that San Jose is part of the Giants fan base and an area where Giants season ticket holders live.

And that contradicts the assertion that the San Jose Market is "untapped." It's more complicated than that. According to one study written over 15 years ago and I read while I worked as Economic Advisor to the Mayor of Oakland in 1997, 47 percent of the San Francisco Giants' fan base comes from San Jose and Santa Clara county. Moving the Oakland Athletics closer to San Jose doesn't mean people will dump their Giants season tickets; it means Oakland season ticket holders would have a new place to go.

The change would be in discretionary spending for residents in the San Jose area, because now going to a baseball game would be a bit easier to do. But after what I calculated as a three-year novelty period as I was creating my Oakland Baseball Simworld (which is used in sports management school programs), spending would drop to normal levels and if the economic unemployment rate did not decrease to around 6 percent, the new stadium would be in big trouble.

Where the San Francisco Giants would be harmed by the Oakland A's is in sponsorship revenue it could capture from that region.

But the main issue is the San Francisco Bay Area is really one big metropolitan area. In the previous blog on this, I was explaining how baseball really is a World export industry, but in the case of the Oakland A's, their marketing effort does not reflect that. I'm not surprised the Field of Schemes blogger spent so much time being snarky that he forgot to think about what he was writing, let alone understand my point.

Stay tuned....This is fun.

Sandra Bullock update: Jesse James reportedly working to save marriage

From the "We hope this is true" file, comes news that Sandra Bullock's husband Jesse James is reportedly working to save their marriage, according to TMZ.com. The report came as part of a larger blog post on James being involved in a CHP (California Highway Patrol) stop. "Law enforcement sources" told TMZ that James was pulled over last Friday, outside of Blythe, California on Highway 10, after James was driving a black Mercedes without a license plate and with tinted windows.

(Now, what's going on in Jesse James' head to do that? James, who makes motorcycles, should have some idea that he would be a target for the CHP driving like that.)

The source explained that Jesse James talked about his marital problems for about 15 minutes and said that he was "heading to Arizona to save his marriage". The CHP officer let Jesse James drive on with a warning.

Hopefully, James is successful in trying to work things out with Sandra Bullock. At least here's hoping so. I know the vast majority of people polled want to see her divorce Jesse James, but marriage is for better or worse, then you most on together.

This is "worse", let's hope they get over it.

Kiana Kim latest Howard Stern Playboy Bunny guest

Just in time for Baseball season, Kiana Kim is the latest Howard Stern Playboy Bunny guest. But who's Kiana Kim? She's MLB legend Pete Rose's girlfriend. Yep. Rose (the Major League Baseball all time leader with 4,256 hits, 3,562 games played, 14,053 at-bats, and 10,328 outs) personally escorted Kim to Howard Stern's show, presumably to protect her from whatever crass statement Stern might issue.

Pete Rose, 68, has dated Kim, 29, since 2009. Wow, that's a 49 year difference, or more years than this blogger's age.

Reportedly, Pete Rose talked about his banishment from Major League Baseball and being held out of the Baseball Hall of Fame because of his gambling issues. Two months ago, MLB Commissioner Bud Selig did not say if and when Pete Rose would be reinstated to baseball when Dan Patrick pressed him on the issue on Patrick's show.

As for Kiana Kim, she's one of Playboy's Sexy 100 of 2009, but the wish in this corner is that Howard Stern would have Gabourey Sidibe from Precious on his show and say nice things about her.

Stay tuned.

Oakland A's Stadium News: MLB to reject Oakland for San Jose

According to a source Monday evening, Major League Baseball (MLB) is set to report that their MLB Baseball Stadium Commission formed to evaluate the Oakland A's stadium situation is going to recommend to MLB Commissioner Bud Selig that the Oakland A's move to San Jose.

The news came too late in the night Monday to check with appropriate key players for their reaction, but it's far to say one person who will not be pleased is Oakland City Attorney John Russo, who has openly said he's considering a lawsuit against both the Athletics and the City of San Jose.

The reasons why MLB would pick San Jose over Oakland will be listed in the report set to be released within three days (unless MLB elects to delay the release of the report after this blog post). But the array of information required and the template that information fits in is not complex or vast. One can guess that San Jose has a more complete stadium development plan. But if Major League Baseball even uses the term "marketing" or "ticket sales" as a San Jose advantage in the report then the stadium committee itself doesn't know what it's talking about.

Let's be more clear. If the stadium committee mentions that San Jose, which is just 30 miles from Oakland and in a smaller population center of the Bay Area (Oakland's at the center of the 3 million population East Bay), but still in The San Francisco Bay Area, and competing with the SF Giants Fan base for ticket revenue, is better for selling tickets, then this blogger will assert that Major League Baseball itself does not understand marketing a stadium product in the 21st Century.

The Oakland A's fan base is really Worldwide. It just hasn't been tapped by the Oakland A's. The Athletics best marketing partnerships are with air travel agents, airlines, convention and visitors bureaus, and hotels. Getting tourists to make baseball-special trips and taking advantage of business travelers who will want to go to MLB rivalry games is the base for ticket sales. It's as important as local sales. Luxury boxes should be considered as right for a national market, where people in Boston can buy part of an Oakland luxury box for Red Sox games. Multiply that approach times the teams in Major League Baseball the A's will play and there's a submarket to go after.

The Oakland A's don't do this. I should be able to go online and find A's ticket sales in several different languages, but I can't. So the problem is 20th Century marketing in a 21st Century World. If the MLB Committee shows that in their evaluation report, they just weren't worth putting together in the first place. Or maybe they were just formed to rubber stamp the idea of moving to San Jose.

The Commissioner would say, as he did earlier this month, that the commission gathered a lot of information. But if their initial questions are wrongheaded, then it doesn't matter how much data they collect: the decision will be the wrong one.

Stay tuned.